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"Fourteen Things That It Took Me Over 50 Years To Learn" by Dave Barry 1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. 2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race…

1. I can see your point, but I still think you’re full of shit. 2. I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce. 3. How about never? Is never good for you? 4. I see you’ve set aside this…

A guy who purchased his lovely wife a "pocket Taser" for their anniversary submitted this... Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 22nd anniversary and I was looking for a little "something extra"…

(Passing only requires 4 correct answers) 1. How long did the Hundred Years War last? 2. Which country makes Panama hats? 3. From which animal do we get cat gut? 4. In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution? 5. What is a camel's…

A mole can dig a tunnel 300 feet long in just one night. A cockroach can live several weeks with its head cut off - it dies from starvation. A crocodile always grows new teeth to replace the old teeth. A group of geese on…

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange: Officer: May I see your driver’s license? Driver: I don’t have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI. Officer: May I see the owner’s card for this…

Scenario: Jack pulls into school parking lot with rifle in gun rack of his truck. 1973: Vice Principal comes over, takes a look at Jack's rifle, goes to his truck and gets his to show Jack. 2007: School goes into lockdown, FBI called, Jack hauled…

*** Now talking in #christian -Word_of_God- Welcome Abstruse to #christian I am a Bible Bot. For more info type: /msg Word_of_God !info -Abstruse- !kjv numbers 22:21 -Word_of_God- Numbers 22:21 -- And Balaam rose up in the morning, and saddled his ass, and went with the…

Dear Co-Workers, As many of you probably know, today is my last day. But before I leave, I wanted to take this opportunity to let you know what a great and distinct pleasure it has been to type “Today is my last day.” For nearly…

Three men wanted to cross a river. They had no idea how to cross it, so one man knelt down on his knees and prayed "Lord give me the power and strength the cross the river." Suddenly the man became very strong and swam across…